Hold Fast

by
Tabaqui

10 Lessons

"It was the forty-fathom slumber that clears the soul and eye and heart, and sends you to breakfast ravening.  They emptied a big tin dish of juicy fragments of fish - the blood ends the cook had collected overnight.  They cleaned up the plates and pans of the elder mess, who were out fishing, sliced pork for the midday meal, swabbed down the foc'sle, filled the lamps, drew coal and water for the cook, and investigated the fore hold, where the boat's stores were stacked.  It was another perfect day - soft, mild, and clear; and Harvey breathed to the very bottom of his lungs."

Tara was talking softly on the phone, and Xander and Oz were at the kitchen counter, slicing up onions and peppers and spinach.  Derio was trying out a lasagna recipe and he'd dragooned them into chopping duty.  Spike had got out of it by volunteering to help Dawn with her homework.  She had some sort of summer cold and had gotten a sick day - and proposed to spend it watching TV since her head 'hurt too much' to read.  Spike had sorted through her backpack, found her book report homework and the book, and was now cozily on the couch with tea and his 'private' reserve of Jaffa Cakes, making Dawn take notes as he read aloud.

I should take a picture.  The evil undead reading to a little girl and sharing cake.

Bugger off.  Just helping the Bit.   Spike shot them both a look.    Xander grinned over at Oz, who grinned back.

And he's wearing YOUR purple flannel shirt and it's about three sizes too big so he's all - floppy and cuddly looking.

Just 'cause it smells good -

And he didn't fix his hair!  It's all curly and loose and fluffy - he looks about fifteen!

And your lumberjack socks!

Awwww!

Awwww!

"You two had bloody well better stop that right now!" Spike yelled.  He glared at them over the long kitchen counter that separated the two rooms and scrunched down further into the couch, tucking his feet under the throw Dawn had over her legs.  She jerked, her head bobbing up and her eyes going wide.

"Right, stop that!  Who said that now?"

"Bit, were you sleeping?"  Spike looked shocked and Xander couldn't help the snorting laughter that had him doubled over the counter.  Oz was holding half an onion and a knife out in front of him, his eyes pouring with tears, giggling uncontrollably.  Derio wiped Oz's face with a paper towel.

"Are you guys making fun of Spike?" he whispered in Oz's ear, and Oz turned his head just enough to get a kiss.

"Course not," Oz whispered back, grinning.  Xander straightened and resumed chopping, and Spike glared at Dawn - at Xander and Oz - at the book.  Then he took a deep breath and went back to reading.

"When dad kerflummoxes that way," said Dan in a whisper, "he's doin' some high-line thinkin' fer all hands.  I'll lay my wage an' share we'll make berth soon.  Dad he knows the cod, an' the fleet they know dad knows.  See 'em comin' up one by one, lookin' fer nothin' in particular, o' course, but scrowgin' on us all the time?"

"I have to go, Willow.   I - I'm glad you fixed Amy, but...  We'll talk l-later.  Bye."  Tara turned off the phone - got up slowly and went to hang it up.  She looked upset and Xander watched her as she washed her hands and found a knife - started chopping spinach.

"All right, Tara?" Xander asked, and she gave him a haunted look from behind her hair.

"Willow fixed Amy-the-rat.  She's a p-person now.  And I'm glad Amy's - back to being human but..."

"But Willow promised," Xander said sadly, and Tara nodded.  Two weeks since the memory spell and Willow had promised no more magic.  

"She didn't even....t-try, I don't think.  She said she had this idea and -"   Tara chopped in silence for a moment and then stopped, her shoulders slumping.

"What am I gonna do, Xander?" she said softly, and Xander was pretty sure she was crying.

"So Disko Troop thought of recent weather, and gales, currents, food supplies, and other domestic arrangements, from the point of view of a twenty-pound cod; was in fact, for an hour, a cod himself, and looked remarkably like one.  Then he removed the pipe from his teeth."

"Tara -"   Xander stopped chopping peppers and wiped his hands on a paper towel - put his arm around Tara's shoulders.  She sniffed and rubbed her arm across her face - started chopping again in a determined, jerky fashion.  "I think - she's just so confused right now...  Giles is working on getting her into that coven in England - getting her some help...  This...addiction...they'll know how to fix it."

Can't be addicted to magic, love - it's not like that.   Spike's gaze caught his above the edge of the book and Xander slowly nodded.  Willow said it was an addiction - that she craved it.  Giles - disagreed.

How do you know?  I mean, couldn't she -

Don't know for sure...   Spike stopped reading - reached out to get his cup and take a long drink of tea.  Dawn blinked at him and held up her pencil, proving she was awake.  Something Dru told me once...  If you can do magic, it's part of you - you can't...it's not something you can have and not have, like a cigarette - it's always there.  It's - what you do with it, how you use it...   Spike trailed off uncertainly and the link was filled for a moment with pictures of Dru - unconnected, random, murky.  I don't...remember.   Xander frowned at that and slowly went back to chopping.  The little stumbles of memory were getting worse.

Be all right, softly from Oz, and Xander nodded, trying not to slice his fingers off.

"It'll be okay, Tara," Xander said finally, and the blonde woman glanced at him, smiling softly.  "We'll figure this out."

"Sorry.  I don't mean to be all - m-moody."

"You're entitled," Derio said, coming to scoop her spinach into a pot and Tara smiled at him, too.  It was fun, having her there, despite the reason why.  She had classes at odd hours and odd days, so you never knew when she'd show up.  She talked about the professors and the other students with a dry, unexpected wit that made them all laugh.  She had discovered a shared interest in cooking with Oz and Derio - and a shared interest in more basic, passive magics with Dawn.  Spike - she treated like a trusted older brother and they'd had one or two late nights, drinking tea and talking.  It made Xander feel even safer - even more content - then before.

Family is getting bigger.  I love it.

Enough for an actual pack, softly from Oz, and Xander had to smile at that.   At the thought of them all living nesting denning in their house - as a family that didn't go away or break your heart.

Tara had moved some pots of herbs onto the back porch and Dawn had graciously allowed her to take over her room a bit, and movie nights and dinner times were more crowded, now.  Derio was coming around more often too.  He felt too restless at home, he said, with aunts and cousins in and out all day long.   He wanted to be with Oz and if nobody minded, he'd do just that.  Nobody did.

"Now you look somethin' like," said Dan.  "Hurry!"

"Keep nigh an' handy," said Troop, "an' don't go visitin' raound the fleet.  Ef any one asks you what I'm cal'latin to do, speak the truth an' say ye don't know."

A little red dory, labelled "Hattie S.," lay astern of the schooner.  Dan hauled in the painter, and dropped lightly on to the bottom boards, while Harvey tumbled clumsily after."

Get Tara settled - get Red bundled off...we can make our own plans to go, Spike thought, and Xander heard the wistful note that was in that suggestion.  Spike still wanted to go, to leave the Hellmouth.  Xander did, too - but he felt like he couldn't, with everything so up in the air.  They'd agreed to make plans, but nothing fixed just yet.

Just a little more time, love.  We'll do it, I promise.  Love you.

Love you.  Want you safe, Spike added, and Xander couldn't argue with that.

"And the wackiness just keeps happening," Buffy said grumpily, tossing a paper down onto the table at the Magic Box.  The headline said something about a diamond and a 'freeze ray' and while Oz read through it Buffy shed her jacket and hat and stomped over to the counter.  She joined Anya in flipping through Bride magazines.

"It's those guys - that Warren guy....the little evil threesome.  I mean, who else would come up with something lame like a freeze ray."  Buffy continued to mutter under her breath and Xander had to admit that the Threesome or whatever - god, NOT an image I want to contemplate were pretty annoying.  They apparently were spending a lot of time calling up various demons and getting them to steal things or fight other demons, and the whole non-human community was getting pretty tired of it.  They'd actually approached Buffy - at Willy's, neutral ground - and through Spike, who didn't know whether to be annoyed or flattered.  Asked her to get them.  Buffy had promised to try, and had gratefully listened to every last scrap of information the different demons had.  But the geek trio was amazingly sneaky, and so far they didn't have anything.

"So, did they kill the security guard?  I mean - frozen, that's kinda extreme," Xander said, looking at the newspaper over Oz's shoulder.

"No - he seems to be okay.   Which is too bad 'cause that'd give me an excuse to go all - Terminator on their asses."  Buffy pushed the magazine away with a sigh and started an aimless walk around the Magic Box, poking at things and making Anya stare at her, narrow-eyed, as she moved the merchandise around infinitesimally. "Where's Spike?"

"Hunting," Xander answered automatically, and then looked up guiltily at the hiss of indrawn breath.  "He's not killing anyone, Buffy.  Swear."

"Better not be," Buffy grumbled, but she sighed again, and Oz looked at her, head a little to one side.

"You okay, Buffy?"  The slayer poked distractedly at a cluster of chicken feet and then flopped down into a chair.

"Yeah.  Kinda.  I'm just...  There's this woman from Social Services coming over."

"There is?"

"What?  Why?"  Oz and Xander both spoke at the same time and Oz pulled his feet up onto the chair seat, frowning over his knees.  Xander sat down in one of the other chairs, frowning as well.  Dawn had been acting out a bit - skipping some classes, getting 'fresh' with the teachers - not doing her homework.   Why was anybody's guess, although Spike was happy to blame it on Janice and brought up the Halloween debacle fairly often as proof.  Dawn just rolled her eyes and snapped back about pots and kettles and then Spike would yell and Dawn would shriek.  It was like Jerry Springer only no nudity, thank god, or chairs being thrown.

"So - when is she coming by?  And why?" Xander asked, and Buffy leaned her elbows up on the table.

"It's 'cause Dawn's been goofing off in school.  And apparently she told the school counselor some stuff.  And - I dunno.  I missed a meeting, but there were these vamps..."  Buffy shook her head.  "I've got a good job, thanks to you, and Dawn has a house and - and tons of people who love her!  I don't understand what more they want!"  Buffy looked frustrated and close to tears and Xander reached out and touched her hand.

"What is it, Buffy?  I mean - Child Welfare around here is a joke.  I should know.  What's the problem?"

"Oh - just...  This woman at the office.  She said - if Dawn doesn't start...behaving...they might take her away.  Send her to live with Dad."  Buffy's lip trembled and she jerked in startlement as Oz growled, wolfing for a moment.

"Over my fucking dead body," Xander snapped, and he wanted to growl too.  "What the hell - is your dad tired of paying child support or something?  Why would anybody think he's the right person to take care of Dawn?  He didn't even come to - to the funeral!"  Buffy winced at that and Xander bit his lip, instantly sorry.  When Hank Summers hadn't shown up to see Joyce laid to rest, the three of them had privately vowed to never let the man have any say in Buffy's life again.  Or Dawn's.

"Geez, guys.  It's...he is her dad," Buffy said slowly, looking a little bewildered, and Oz took a deep breath, hugging his legs tightly.

"It's just - Dawn's part of the pa- part of the family, Buffy," Oz said softly, and Xander nodded.

"Family.  You mean pack.  You almost said pack.  She's part of...this...whatever."  Buffy made vague motions towards Xander and Oz, frowning a little.

Well, won't lie to her about it.

Can't hurt, as Spike says.  Want me to tell her?   Oz looked considering - nodded, finally.

Still closer friends than me, so yeah.

"Okay...  Remember up on the tower, Buffy?  When you - when you gave some of Dawn's blood to Spike?"

"Yeeah..." Buffy said slowly.  "I just - I hoped he'd just...   I thought it was kinda ritual-y.  That he'd...kind of adopt her or something.  I just wanted her to be safe," Buffy whispered the last, and Xander smiled at her.

"It's okay.  It worked.  It's just - there's all this magic, in blood...  And it worked really well.  You know how I can hear Spike and Oz - and they can hear me?  How we all know what the other is thinking and feeling?"  Buffy nodded, wide-eyed and Xander smiled at her, trying to be reassuring.

"Well, the thing is...after that we could hear Dawn.  It was good!" Xander said hastily, as Buffy scowled, opening her mouth to say - something.  "Wait, okay?  It was good.  She had a lot of...nightmares, at first, and - she stayed with us and we knew what she needed, you know?  We could help her.  It faded after a week or so.  Now we can only hear her when she's in the same room, and it's just - basic stuff.  Strong emotions.  Helps us know when she's lying."  Xander grinned and Buffy stared at him a minute, and then she grinned back.

"So that's how Spike - !  Oh, wow, that's...kinda creepy.  But good!  You're right.  It's good.  Does she know?"  

"We never told her.  Didn't seem like a good idea."   Buffy nodded - thought for a second and then a look came over her face.  "She can't hear you guys, can she?"

"No.  Not at all.  She didn't - she never got any of Spike's blood, so - it's only one way."

"Thank god.  I mean, you guys - not exactly discreet...  Anya told me about The Roof."   Buffy giggled, and Xander put his head down on the table.  "No teenager needs that in their head."

"I'm never going up there again," Xander mumbled, ignoring Oz's snickering.

"So, anyway," Buffy said, heaving a huge sigh, "this woman is going to come by and - inspect - and they don't say when or anything and I might not even be home or - or what if I'm all covered in demon goo or something?  What if I forgot to do the dishes?"  Xander lifted his head and pushed his fingers back through his hair.

"They don't take kids away 'cause there's some dishes in the sink," Oz said calmly, and Buffy shook her head.

"But what if there's a lot?  And - and Willow is there -what if they think I'm in a gay relationship?  The government hates that!  And -"

"Buffy -" Oz said, and he leaned forward, putting his hand on top of hers.  "It's going to be okay.  You've got a good job - insurance, even!  You've got friends who are willing to help any time.  And you know the government will love Giles.  And - even if they don't like something, they won't just snatch Dawn."

"Yeah, he's right," Xander said, and Buffy looked from Oz to him, her expression eloquently pleading for comfort.

"I mean - they came to my house a couple of times, but I never got - taken.   They just...don't care that much."  Xander couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice and Buffy winced slightly.

"Oh, Xan, I’m sorry.  I'm being such a - drama queen.  I know you guys'll do anything...  Dawn really loves you, you know?"  She looked at him - looked at Oz, her face softening into a relaxed, slightly bewildered smile.  "Even Spike - or maybe, especially Spike.  She just...  She loves you guys and loves being part of your...family.   I never really..."  Buffy stopped, and wiped distractedly at her eyes, blinking.  "I never really said thanks for - everything you guys did while I was dead.  It was wonderful and - I can't ever repay you."

"Buff - come on.  Repay?  There's - we'd have done it no matter what."

"'Cause of the blood," Buffy said quietly, and Oz shook his head.

"No.  I mean, yeah, that made it stronger but - she was f - she was pack long before that."  Oz said it calmly but Xander could feel his anxiety in the link and there was an echo from Spike, who'd been eavesdropping the whole time - who was just down the street, now.

She won't care.  She - understands.   Xander was sure of it, and the anxious feeling lessened a bit.

"She was?  My bratty little screechy little sister?"  Buffy said it with a smile but there was something - else - there.

"You're part of our family too, Buffy," Xander said.  "Not quite the same, but - you know we'd do anything for you."

"I know," Buffy said quietly.  

"Enough of this."  It was Spike, coming in the back door, cigarette pluming smoke and blood down the side of his duster and Anya put up a hand, having been engrossed in her Bride magazine the whole time.

"Don't get blood on anything, Spike," she said, and Spike grinned at her.

"Too much wallowing.  Everything'll be fine, Slayer, you'll see.  Won't let anybody take the Bit."  He swirled the duster off and draped it over the stairs - came over to Xander's chair, Scoot up in the link.  He swung his leg over the back of the chair and dropped down behind Xander, putting an arm around his waist and snuggling his face into Xander's hair for a moment.  Xander leaned back into him, smiling.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but...  I believe you, Spike.  Must be the apocalypse when a Slayer trusts a vampire more than...just about anybody else."

"Nah, no apocalypse," Spike said, his voice a little muffled.  Xander shivered pleasantly at the lips and tongue-tip that were just brushing the nape of his neck.  "Just you finally using your brains, 'stead of your fists."  He grinned over at her and reached out with his other hand, to rub once gently down Oz's arm, love safe family in the link.

Buffy rolled her eyes.  "Like you'd know anything about that.  Fine.  I'm going to just - just try not to wig about it.  Tomorrow - I'm going to get my hair cut."  She lifted her hair up over her head, letting it fall through her fingers and Anya perked up, coming out from behind the counter and looking interested for the first time all night.

"You are?  Really?  Do you have a style picked out?  Maybe you should look through some magazines and see what you'd like.  I know the stylist downtown, he's just so good -"

God - let me up!  Don't want to be dragged into a hairstyle discussion!  Xander struggled a little against Spike's hold - mostly he just rocked back, grinding his ass into Spike a little, twisting, and Spike's teeth bit down on his neck, making him shiver.

Fuck yeah.  We're done here, anyway.   Oz was already standing up and grabbing his jacket, feeling for his keys.  Derio had had a rehearsal tonight - well, more of a 'band talk'.  A couple of the band members were starting to want to move on - do other things, and they had to figure out the band's future.  He was coming by later.

You hurt, Spike?  What was all that blood? Oz added, sniffing pointedly towards the vampire and Spike grinned, standing up and pulling Xander with him.

Not hurt.  Just found a fledge who had a little fight in him - took my time.   The cascade of images made Xander shiver, just a little.  And not because they were gruesome, but because of the rush of gleeful pleasure and arousal that they had sparked in Spike, and that he was pouring through the link.  Spike grabbed his duster and carefully folded the blood to the inside - hung it over his arm.

"'Night, Buffy!  'Night, Anya!"  Xander called, and got a double hand-flip from the two.  They went out the back to where Oz had his van parked.

"So - anybody up for a little more patrol?"  Spike asked, snaking one arm around Oz's waist and the other around Xander, pulling them both close.  The link was alive with energy, arousal, bloodlust, and Xander felt the hyena stirring - let it surface and voiced a low, chuckling sort of growl.

"Count me in," he said, and Oz yipped, black-eyed and grinning.

"That's my boys," Spike murmured, gold-gleaming eyes sparking in the dimness.  He put his duster in the back of the van and then they were running, the link thick with excitement, into another Hellmouth night.

"Bloody...sodding...buggering...fucking phone, where the hell is it..."  Spike scrabbled through the detritus that littered the bedside table - a newspaper, a couple of empty soda cans, lube, the handcuffs, the clock-radio whose radio still worked but whose alarm he had broken, the clock-radio whose alarm still worked but whose radio Xander had broken, a shirt, for fuck's sake, but no phone.  He hung half off the bed, eyes closed, listening.  

Under the bed?  How in hell -   He reached as far as he could and snagged it - hauled himself back up and flopped down on his back, fumbling blindly for the button.  He wouldn't normally touch the phone but this many rings meant someone was calling twice in a row, neatly circumnavigating the voicemail.  So it could be an emergency.

And if it's not I'm gonna kick somebody's arse.   "Fucking what?" he growled, and heard a sharp intake of breath on the line.  Then:

"S-spike?"

Oh BLOODY HELL!  Red.

"What the fuck do you want, witch," he snapped, his hand tightening down dangerously hard on the handset.  The plastic creaked and he forced himself to relax a little.

"I - is...   No, okay.  Listen, Spike.  Those guys - Warren and his friends, they've been screwing around again and they made some sort of - ray.  And now Buffy's invisible and I'm trying to figure out how to undo it before something awful happens."

"Yeah, so?  I don't give a fuck 'bout that."  Another intake of breath, sharp and startled and Spike grinned to himself.  You'll figure it out eventually, Red - I'm not your friend.

"You - you just..."  Another few breaths and a nervous cough.  "I'm calling to tell you that Dawn is going to come over after school.  Buffy doesn’t want her around in case - in case we have to go find these guys or something.  So just - just be ready for her."

"Yeah, no problem," Spike said and punched the off button.  Bloody Threesome.  Christ.   Spike pushed the phone under his pillow - grabbed Xander's pillow and curled himself around it.  The working clock said one-seventeen, so he let his eyes drift shut, snuggling down.  Bit's got a key, and it's daylight.  She'll be safe comin' up the walk and I'll know she's here.   He was asleep again in moments.

Waking up the second time was just as annoying, only this time it was Dawn pounding up the stairs, singing along with her Discman to some awful pop tune.  Her voice was fine, but the lyrics were dreadful pap.

God.  And I thought MY poetry was awful.  How in hell do they even get record deals?   Spike rolled onto his back, groaning, and Dawn stopped outside the door.

"Spike!  Are you up?  Are you dressed?"

"I'm up now, Bit!  But you know I'm not dressed - in bed, aren't I?"  He grinned, waiting.

"TMI, Spike!  I'm gonna get something to eat.  Want something to eat?"

"Sure, Niblet.  Be down in a minute."   She stomped off, singing again, and Spike winced - got up and stretched hard.  He took a fast shower, more to wake up than to get clean, and rubbed his hair with a towel but left the gel out.  Xander liked it this way, soft and a little curly, and he'd be home soon...  Spike felt for him in the link and got a distracted internal pet, Xander's focus being mostly on a blueprint or an invoice - something work related and complicated.  Oz was, apparently, playing his guitar at the shop, singing softly with Giles.  Spike got the impression that they were taking a break, and a brief impression of Ethan practicing his meditation on the exercise mats came through.  Satisfied that his family was fine, Spike pulled on some jeans and then looked around for a shirt.  The two he picked up were stained, one with blood and one with -

Lube.  And come.  Jesus.  Why is it MY shirts are always the ones used for clean-up? Grimacing, he tossed the shirt aside.  There were some clean ones down in the laundry room he was pretty sure, so he padded out of the room and downstairs, wondering why Dawn had stopped singing.  When he got to the bottom of the steps he saw why.  Sitting bolt-upright and uncomfortable on the couch was Dawn, and across from her in the newer recliner was...

Well fuck, Spike thought, staring at the folder the woman held in her hands - the one stamped Child Welfare Services.  This won't be pretty.   He fought the desire to simply vamp out and pounce on the woman - drain her and toss her in the river.  Government employees get killed all the time.  Everybody wants 'em dead - who'd care?  But Dawn looked anxious - looked a little ill, in fact, and the anxiety rolling off her was intense.  He sighed internally - ran a hand back through his hair.

"Uh.  Hello.  Haven't had a chance to bring the clean clothes upstairs yet," he said, smiling something as close to his real smile as he could.  The woman was eyeing him with what looked like disapproval and he swung around the newel post and walked swiftly back to the laundry room and snatched the first t-shirt he saw.  It was white - one of Xander's - and a little baggy but that was probably better than skin-tight black.  He looked down at his bare feet and then shrugged.  Nothing to be done - his boots were in the utility sink, covered in muck.  Dawn's anxiety nattered at him and he walked back to the living room, wishing he could get a quick drink.      

"He - he's here when I come home from school - he h-helps me do my homework and - and we make dinner together -"  Dawn was talking too fast, her face stiff and uncertain and Spike put his hand gently on her shoulder, squeezing just a little.  Then, with an internal shudder, he dredged up William.

"I'm William Sinclair, Miss -?"

"Oh! Mrs.  I'm Mrs. Kroger," the woman smiled uncertainly and Spike smiled back - moved forward to take her hand.  He squeezed gently, leaning forward the tiniest bit in an imitation of a bow.

"Mrs. Kroger.  I never would have guessed.  Such a pleasure to meet you.  Can I get you anything?  Coffee?"

"I - uh - no.  No, Mr. Sinclair -"

"Call me Will, Mrs. Kroger, please," Spike said, and sat down on the couch next to Dawn.  Dawn was goggling at him and laughter shock laughter was in the link.

"Will.  Yes."  Mrs. Kroger seemed flustered and she looked down blankly at the folder in her hands for a moment.  "Now then.  Dawn was just telling me that you live here?  And who are you, exactly?  As pertains to Dawn?"

"Well, I feel like a big brother," Spike said, patting Dawn on the knee, smiling hard.   Dawn looked down at his hand and then made a muffled noise, burying her face in her hands.  "Bless you, Dawn.  Hay fever, you know," Spike continued smoothly, feeling Dawn tremble with fiercely repressed laughter.  "I'm just an old friend of the family, really.  We met through Mr. Rupert Giles?  He was the librarian at Sunnydale High school and became close to Dawn's mother and older sister.   Both of us being British, we banded together somewhat."  Spike smiled again and Dawn snuffled into her hands.  

"Go and get a tissue, Dawn," Spike said, and Dawn shot him a look, scrambling up off the couch and heading towards the bathroom, laughter still in the link.

"Yes, I see that Mr. Giles is listed as one of our contacts in case of emergency.  You are, also, as well as a - Alexander Harris?  Is he here?"

"No, he's working.  Alves and Son?  He's a foreman there."    Just answer her questions, don't volunteer anything.   He could feel Oz in the link, question, and he answered him fast.  There was a moments pause, then questionagain, and Spike knew what he was asking.

Nah - be all right.  I'll be fine, he thought, and Oz backed off.  Xander was still vague - caught up in his work - and Spike did his best to keep the link calm.

"I see.  There are - several other people here as well - Dawn has an impressive number of contacts."  Mrs. Kroger rattled her papers and Spike nodded.  Who bloody else?  Not demon-girl, I hope...

"She has a lot of people who love her, Mrs. Kroger," Spike said smoothly, and the woman looked blankly at him, as if not quite believing him.

"Yes.  I see that a...Daniel Osbourne also resides here?  Is he here?"  

"No.  He works downtown.  It's just me right now.  Is that a problem?"  He let a slight frown cross his face - leaned forward, projecting as much sincerity as he could.  Mrs. Kroger smelled of hairspray and patchouli.

"Oh, no, mister...  Will.  I just like to meet as many people as I can.  So what do you do?"  Spike stared at her, his mind utterly blank.

"He's in a band," Dawn said brightly, startling them both, and Spike turned to look at her, making a face where Mrs. Kroger couldn't see.  Dawn grinned and came to sit down next to him again, her face pink but the laughter under control, apparently.

"Yeah, a band.  They play all over the place - they're getting real famous!"  Mrs. Kroger nodded, making a note, and Spike gritted his teeth.

"Well, not terribly famous.  But you have to do something.  I'm - going back to school in the spring."   Heard the Slayer and Glinda talk about it enough, I can do school-talk...  

"Oh?  Well that's good.  School is very important."  Mrs. Kroger looked ready to pounce and Spike quickly out-flanked her.

"It is important, Mrs. Kroger - very important.  We've all been very - upset about the liberties Dawn has taken in school.  But I can assure you - she's back on track now.  Aren't you, Bit?"  Dawn scowled at him, then turned a sweet smile on the woman.

"Yeah.  I -uh - there was...my mom, and...that really upset me.  And my dad - he just...isn't around.  Sometimes it's hard to concentrate on stuff like math when - when you feel all alone." Dawn said, and Spike wanted to roll his eyes.  He settled for another knee-pat instead, and Mrs. Kroger nodded slowly.

Christ, Niblet, lay it on with a trowel!  Just - promise you'll be good so we can throw this bint out!

"I understand that losing your mother was hard, Dawn, but that was - some time ago.  Don't you think that -?"

"It wasn't even a year ago -" Spike interrupted, his voice dropping to a growl as anger sorrow flowed out from Dawn.

"Losing a parent affects everyone d-differently," a voice said, and they looked up in startlement, seeing Tara standing in the doorway, clutching her backpack.  "I lost my mother - years ago.  It s-still hurts me.  I'm Tara Mm-maclay."  Tara came forward, her hand out, and Mrs. Kroger got to her feet.  She shook hands, then looked down at her folder.

"Maclay?  I don’t' see your name here."  

"Oh, no.  You don't.  I'm just staying here temporarily.  I - was in a b-bad situation with a roommate who was - out of control.  Xander and S - everyone are l-letting me stay here until I can find something of m-my own."

"Oh, I see."  Mrs. Kroger sat down again, making more notes, and Tara made a wide-eyed face at Spike and Dawn, and then moved around to sit in the other recliner, the one they'd moved over from the old house.

"So you live here - and Mr. Osbourne, Mr. Harris, Mr. Sinclair...  That seems like a lot of people for this house!  Must be pretty crowded."  She looked around her, and Spike fought the demon, wanting her out.  Protect pack protect family thrumming in the link and Xander was aware, now, and telling him calm and Oz the same.  He breathed deeply and smiled some more, wondering if it looked as awful as it felt.

"Dawn has her own room upstairs, Mrs. Kroger," Spike said quietly, and she looked sharply at him.

"Does she now? I'd like to see it, please.  Dawn, if you'd be so kind?"  She stood up and Dawn shot a worried glance at them both.  Spike nodded, trying to look relaxed.

"I don’t think I le-ft a mess, Dawn - go ahead," Tara said, standing up as well.  "Dawn's letting me use her r-room while I'm - in transition," Tara added, smiling, and Mrs. Kroger made a note and followed Dawn upstairs.  When they heard Dawn's door open, Spike jumped up and vamped, growling.

"Bloody hell!  That woman -"     Gotta do this right, gotta be calm, Bit's fine, she's fine...  The demon was raging - was terrified and Spike couldn't figure out why.  They had a handle on this!  But the demon was incoherent -confused and angry, and he felt his control slipping.  Felt his hold on things rippling out of place, becoming unsteady.

Tara shushed him.  "She's just d-doing her job.  You're doing great, Spike, r-really."

"Hate this," Spike muttered, pacing.  He ran his hand back through his hair and wondered if he dared smoke a cigarette.  Protect protect protect...not pack...dark in here...don't trust them, don't - see them - who's here...?   He felt - wrong.  He felt lost.  Tara was saying something and he couldn't hear her and he shook his head helplessly.   The demon howled, and Spike struggled for control.  Dawn's here, she's safe, we're - fuck, fuck, fuck, where IS she, where's - Xander, can't - why can't I hear Dawn, why can't I hear Tara?  Family, should hear the family -

Calm calm - love, what is it, what is it? from Xander, insistent, and he shut his eyes, breathing in ragged pants.

Tell me - can't...see...safe? Is it safe?  Xan - where -   The phone rang, startling him, and Tara went to pick it up, looking frightened.  A moment later she came over to Spike, holding it out.

"Spike?  It's Xander.  Talk to him."  Spike took the phone, his hand shaking hard.

"Xan?"

"Spike - it's okay.   What's - what's going on?  Just - calm down, love, please.  It's safe."

"I can't - think.  There's - something..."  He couldn't remember, suddenly, where everyone was - couldn't remember if the Slayer was there or dead - if Dawn was dead or if he'd saved her and he groped through the sudden fog in his mind - felt Tara's hand on his arm, guiding him into the kitchen and getting him to sit down.

"Spike, it's okay.  I'm coming home.  Oz is.  Just - hold on, okay?  You have to just - calm down. Dawn's safe, Tara's there - it's okay."  

"What is this?" Spike whispered, shaking hard. He put his head down on the table, his fingernails digging into the wood, the phone creaking in his other hand as he all but crushed it.  "What is this?  What - Xan - it's all....come loose, it's -"

"It's okay, it's okay!"   Calm calm, love you!  Look - it's all fine, it's all good...  Images in the link that Xander was pouring out to him - Buffy alive, all of them together, Dawn safe - and Spike latched onto them fiercely, forcing himself to calm down, forcing himself to see.

What the fuck is this?  I'm not - it's like that fuckin' bitch is in my head, it's like that ward-magic the mage does, it's...

Hold fast, Spike.  Right?  Hold fast, I'm coming, I'm coming,

Pack pack pack from Oz, closer and closer and suddenly the back door - specially rigged - flew open and the wolf bounded in, moving fast.   He was across the room and against Spike; hot, panting breath and heaving ribs, russet fur warm from the sun and Spike slid off the chair and folded himself around Oz, burying his face in the fur that smelled of cinnamon, magic, almonds, family family  

Safe, we're safe, I'm here, hold on - hold on...   And Spike did.

"What did she do to me, love?" Spike asked softly, and Xander shifted a little, pulling him closer.  They were on the couch and Spike was between Xander's legs, leaning back against his chest.  Oz was there as well, Spike's legs in his lap, his fingers gently rubbing ankle-bones and shins, cupping his toes.  Tara and Dawn were on the floor, within reach, and Spike kept putting his hand out, touching Dawn's hair or Tara's shoulder.  Xander hugged him closer - buried his face in Spike's neck for a moment.

Love you love you.   "I don't know, Spike.  I don't know.  But we'll fix it.  I mean - Willow got Tara back so we can - we can find a way to fix whatever Glory did.  Promise, love."  Spike was just - numb, in the link - family family pack safe here here here   Desperate for confirmation and they were trying - were staying close, touching him - trying to ground him.  Xander kept his own terror locked down tight.

What if that fuckin' chip did some damage, anyway, and then Glory just - made it worse?  What if - fuck - what if it CAN'T be fixed?  God...love you, love you, safe now...

"Spike?  I still - get nightmares.  I ssometimes just - lose it for a second.  I d-don't think -   I th-think it's just...the aftermath.  I think you'll g-get better."  Tara looked scared and a little guilty, and Spike turned wide eyes on her, touching her cheek.

"Glinda, you should have said, you - are you okay, pet?  You -"

"Yeah, I'm - f-fine, I'm just saying it's -   What she did was p-pretty extreme, it's n-not something you can j-just...shrug off."

"You should have told us, Tara," Oz said softly, smiling at her.  "We want to help - with anything, you know?"

"Yeah, I know," Tara whispered, looking down, and Dawn took her hand.  There was the roar of an engine and the screech of tires, and running feet.  Oz looked sharply at the door, tense, and Derio burst through, wild-eyed.  Something - changed - something seemed to charge the air, and Xander felt Spike relax in his arms that little bit more.  Felt himself relax, and felt the wave of relief from Oz, and something like it from Dawn.  

God, this is getting so - weird...

"Dios mio, Oz, Que paso?!  Ta bien?"   Derio stopped - took a huge breath - walked fast over to Oz and kissed him hard.  Then he turned to Spike, Oz's hand tight in his, and finally spoke in English.  "Spike, you okay?  I got this - this horrible feeling -"   He shuddered all over and Spike smiled at him, leaning forward to gently rub his shoulder.

"I'm - okay now.  Let - let Oz or...Xander tell you.  I'm just...tired..."  Spike slid down a little, burrowing into Xander's arms, and Xander hugged him close, kissing his hair, his forehead.

Family's all here, pack's all here, we're safe, safe... he thought, and Spike sighed and closed his eyes.



____________________

Rudyard Kipling - Captains Courageous, chapt. 3

Dios mio, Oz, Que paso?! - My God, Oz, what the Hell is going on?

Ta bien? - Are you all right?



Thank you, Jillapet, for translating!

11 Enemies

Spike was walking down by the river.  Just strolling, really.  Remembering.  

THERE was where wolfling was, and HERE was where we went into the river, and there....fuck, there was where we fucked and it was bloody good...  He'd been doing this every night for nearly two weeks.  Remembering.   Because - whatever happened at the house - whatever that fit was - it would not happen again.  It had scared him, that slip.   He'd had fuzzy moments, since Glory.  A minute here or there when he just wasn't sure what was going on.  But they'd been fleeting - easily put aside.  That had been horrible.  He'd knelt there on the kitchen floor for twenty minutes, give or take.  Holding desperately to Oz, sliding in and out of knowing like a needle through cloth - sometimes on the right side, sometimes not.  The woman from the state had been ushered out, and Spike knew Tara had pushed her just the tiniest bit - told her that everything was fine in just that way so the woman walked out without asking after Mr. Sinclair.  He'd felt that, that push - it had shivered over him and made him keen in terror - it had twisted him inside out for a minute or more and thank god, thank god - Xander had come in the door then, Xander had added himself to the link and to him - physically holding him, stroking work-rough hands over and over his arms and neck and hair - had lifted him and carried him to the couch while Oz darted into the back for clothes.

That was what had brought him back - Oz and Xander piling on, physically anchoring him and then Dawn, holding his hand in a death-grip, and Tara the same.  Solid presence, holding him against the swell and toss of whatever dark sea he was lost in, the link thick with them - with love and reassurance and pack family safe, safe, safe.  

Fucking Hellgod.  He fumed quietly, smoking, standing and looking at the glinting surface of the river - at the far shore where willows and cottonwood dipped down towards the water.  Even without his vamp-face on, he could see the bare limbs swaying and threshing in the breeze.  Glinda can help - she knows...  And the Watcher.   He shook his head, thinking of Tara.  She'd been so upset, the next day, guilty over the push she'd aimed at Mrs. Kroger.  Second and third-guessing herself and her anger with Willow.   They'd talked about it, and she'd finally let it go, but vowed quietly to never, ever do it again.  Spike wanted to tell Tara that she could do ten times the magic Red did and never do the harm, because Tara thought things through, and she listened.   She was a sea-anchor - a tap root that went deep - and she would have to truly want to hurt someone for her magics to be bad.

A report from Dawn - that Willow had gone out with Amy and spent all night doing magics all over town, had made her sink a little deeper into her sadness - but firm her resolve to not go back until Willow managed to stop.   Privately, Spike didn't think she'd ever get the chance to go back, and he was glad.  Willow - had hurt Tara enough, and he wouldn't let his pack be touched again.

Finishing his cigarette, Spike flicked it away and started walking again.  In three weeks, it would be Christmas.  This year the same as the last, with only the Slayer's house being decorated, and the rest of them planning their holiday around what Dawn might like.   Tara had told her all about the Solstice - told her they'd stay up all night with a fire on the beach and sing King Lugh back up into the sky - send the Lord of Misrule back to sleep.  

And then the New Year and then it's two years I've had my love and we're still here in this misbegotten hole.  We've got to get OUT of here...it's not safe...   Spike shook his head.  He wasn't going to think about that, not right now.  Not out here in the dark, when his family was so far away.  He felt for Xander and Oz and smiled to himself.  Xander was at home, on the back porch, braving the few bugs drawn to the porch light to finish the gift he was making for Buffy.  A beautifully carved chest, lined with cedar, ornamented with brass.  He was making things for everyone - useful things, practical things.  But everything was decorated in high relief and low; carved with birds and flowers, animals and stars and leafing vines.  He spent hours rubbing the wood smooth, and working oil into it to make it glow - polishing and perfecting and Spike felt a swelling of pride every time he saw the beautiful things his Xander made.

A handsome man and a goodly man and a man of talent and skill...   He grinned to himself.  Xander made him think in poet's words, and that was...

A wonder.  You're a wonder, my love.   Warmth, all through the link and Xander right there, practically inside him.

I'm not any more special than you are.  I love you...my Spike, my own...

Love, you've no idea...   Spike had to close his eyes, almost reeling from the flood of love and warmth and want that Xander sent - pack and family.  From Oz came much the same - contentment and love and connection and he sent it all back as hard as he could.  Oz was out as well; it was the full moon, and he didn't have to change but he always felt restless, and Derio had encouraged him - told him it was natural for the wolf to want to be out and that he should go.   The night was overcast - rain imminent - but the moon still called him.  Spike had felt it, through the link - a wordless, skirling song that Oz wanted to dance to - howl to - hunt to.   Oz was somewhere...south, loping through a neighborhood, tailing a small demon that seemed to prey on household pets.  A hunt that would settle him and send him home relaxed.   Spike smiled, sliding into the images the wolfling was sending for just one moment and he practically jumped out of his skin as a ripple of - something - washed over him.  He froze, concentrating. He could hear a fight - flesh against flesh and a cry - and felt a familiar itching at the back of his skull.

Slayer?  What the hell - she's not dusting a vamp -   He looked up, searching the top of the bluff.  There was a cemetery half a mile away, but the riverbank here was all trees - a thin tongue of forest that the city hadn't cleared yet for more graves.  The land sloped rather sharply up, and Spike could only see tree-tops and tufts of dead grass.

Spike?  What is it?

Don't know, love, it's -   There was a sudden thudding flurry and Spike whirled around - watched a body flop and tumble its way to the bottom of the steep incline.  There was a crashing, and a moment later Buffy was stumbling down the hill, tripping and skidding and catching wildly at winter-bare branches.

"Oh my god - oh, my god -"   She was mumbling to herself and Spike strode towards her, watching as she frantically turned the body over, feeling for a pulse.

"Slayer?  What -"

"Ahh!  Oh - god, Spike!"  Buffy leapt half-way to her feet, startled, and then slumped back down, her eyes huge and bewildered looking under the knitted cap she wore.  "I think - I killed her.  She's dead and I killed her!"  Buffy's voice was rising - getting a little hysterical - and Spike moved swiftly - knelt down beside the body.  A college-age girl, definitely dead.  Spike took a deep breath - reached out and carefully felt the body, testing.

Jesus - Spike, what in hell?

Something's not right...

Question from Oz, faint but steady, and Spike shook his head.

Don't know - hang on...   "Slayer - calm down.  She's hours dead.  Already going into rigor.  And I can smell -"   Spike stopped talking because Buffy looked like she might be sick.  She stared at him, shivering.

"What - what do you mean?  How can she - she was screaming, she was being attacked and -" Spike lifted his head suddenly, scenting - listening.  He put his finger up to his lips, and then in one swift, near-silent move he was on his feet and running.  He saw the figure - the spy - dart out from behind a tree and make a run for it, struggling clumsily through the underbrush.  He accelerated and pounced, bringing the fleeing figure down and rolling once, twice.  He pinned its arms to the dirt - got one knee sharply into a heaving abdomen and looked down in disbelief at the face of the dead girl.



I'm still confused, Xander thought, and got back the mental equivalent of a snort.

So am I.  But we'll have this sorted soon.   Xander did a rolling stop through a deserted intersection and then accelerated up the street, heading for Giles' house.  It had started to rain and the windshield wipers were a slow and steady counterpoint to the wilder beating of his heart.  Spike and Buffy were almost at the older man's house; Spike carrying the body, Buffy carrying the - body - which wasn't dead.   Oz was nearly there as well, streaking across town, demon prey forgotten.  Xander had a bundle of clothes for him in a bag that Tara was holding in her lap.

"So this is what it's like to really be a S-scooby," she said, grinning at him.  "Called out in the middle of the night to bring c-clothes for naked werewolves."  Xander grinned back, nodding.
               
"Oh yeah.  At least it's not a naked vampire.  I wouldn't mind, but I don't think Buffy or Giles would appreciate it.  And calling Giles at ten o'clock at night to tell him Spike and Buffy are bringing bodies to his house?  Not so much fun."  Derio they'd left behind, asleep in Oz's bed.  He had an early morning, and didn't feel quite as comfortable around Ethan as Oz did.

Their magics don't get along, Oz had said, meaning that whatever gifts Derio had - the Knowing, he called it - jangled rather badly with Ethan's perpetual, chaotic seepage.  

Xander made the last turn, pulling into the parking lot and there was a thump behind him.  He glanced in his rear-view mirror and saw Oz in the truck-bed, panting, mouth wide in a wolfish grin.

Pack, the ever-present hum that identified Oz more than anything, and Xander braked to a slow stop and they got out.  Oz leapt lightly down, pushing his nose under Tara's hand, leaning into her legs for a moment.

Spike's just at the door-

What in BLOODY HELL-

Crap - what now?   "Gotta hurry," Xander said.  He grabbed Tara's hand and they ran up the sidewalk and down the stairs, the rain falling harder now, pattering on car-roofs and the sidewalk, bringing a strong ozone smell to the air, and the rich scent of wet earth and leaves.  Oz bounded ahead, his wet fur clumping in spikes.  Giles' door was open, and Buffy was inside - Spike in the doorway itself, body slung over his shoulder.  Voices were being raised, and:

Angelus DARLA what the FUCK from Spike, all-over shiver of familiarity and dislike.

Darla?  What - Spike, is Giles all right?   What's going on?    They got up to the doorway themselves and Giles was standing there, looking harried.  Ethan was at the breakfast bar, perched on a stool and looking gleefully amused.  And there was a stranger - a man - worn jeans and work-shirt, scruffy beard, dark hair, glasses.  He was holding something.

"What is it?" Tara whispered, and Xander shook his head.

"I don't - know.  Something strange is going on.  Spike - come on, we're getting wet."

"Watcher, what the fuck is going on?  Where's the bitch?  Where's Angel?"  Spike was as tense as a bow-string, vamped and growling and Oz was trying to push past him into the apartment, growling a little himself.  Spike's hair was wet - raindrops were spangling on his eyelashes and beading on the shoulders of his coat.

Fuck.  So beautiful...I just want to BE with him.  I'm so sick of all this damn Hellmouth crap... For the first time, Xander truly felt he could simply walk away from Sunnydale and never come back.  The rush of pleased surprise from Spike made him smile.

"Spike, if you would come in I could explain - there's really no need for everyone to be standing on my doorstep, getting soaked!  Especially -"   Giles lowered his voice, taking a step closer, "since you are carrying a body.  Now get in here."  

Angel's not here.  Go in!   Oz was frustrated and he grabbed the edge of Spike's duster in his teeth and pulled.

"Oi!  Wolf - you'll tear it!   And how do you know..."  Another growl from Oz and Spike hissed in frustration. "Fine, then.  I'm comin' in.  But if the bastard and the bitch are here, somebody's going to be bloody sorry!"  Spike finally stomped in and Xander and Tara exchanged looks of bewilderment and followed.  Buffy had put her own body - a blond-haired girl - on Giles' couch, and Spike took the person he was carrying and laid her out on the floor.  They were identical.  Giles shut the door, locking it, and Ethan got up from the stool, eyeing the figure on the couch.

"That's a - glamour.  An illusion of some sort."  He went over to the unconscious girl and put his fingertips on her forehead.  "Let go, let go," he murmured, and the figure rippled - reformed.  It was a boy, slight and dark-haired, pale.  A bruise on his jaw and a trickle of blood coming from his nose.

"Hey!  I know him!" Buffy was staring at the boy.  Tara handed the bag of clothes over to Oz and he trotted away down the hall, bag swinging from his jaws, going to the downstairs bathroom.  Spike was glaring at the stranger, who was staring at him with wide, frightened eyes.

"Rupert, you never said - William the Bloody?  In your home?  I thought -" the man shook his head, cuddling his bundle closer.  "Good Lord, man!"

"Wesley?" Xander asked, incredulous, sudden recognition flooding him.  He sent it through the link, fast, telling Oz and Spike.  He's a Watcher!  They sent him for Buffy when Giles got kicked out - he's ...really changed.  What's he doing HERE?

"Yes, I'm - Xander?  Xander Harris?  Good Lord."  Wesley looked at him in shock and Xander had to grin.

"Wesley?"  Buffy gaped at the man - shook her head in disbelief.   "Okay - what is going on?  I thought I was in the middle of something weird...  Giles?  Wanna explain?"

"Not really," Giles said, sitting down heavily on a stool and Ethan went over to him, settling beside him and putting one hand lightly on his shoulder, rubbing.

"It's all right, love," he murmured, and Giles gave him a tired smile, patting his hand.

"Please - if everyone will sit down - Tara, good heavens, I didn't see you - please, sit down..."  Buffy and Tara took the couch on either side of the unconscious boy.  Xander went to where Spike was standing and tugged his hand - got him to sit on the floor facing Giles.  Wesley took the armchair, fussing over his blanket-wrapped bundle, and a moment later Oz came out from the bathroom, dressed and carrying towels.  He handed them out to Spike and Buffy and Tara.  His own hair was sticking up in the exact damp tufts the wolf's had been, and Xander had to suppress the sudden laugh that came with the mental image of Oz doing a full-body shake, spraying water everywhere.

Did that in the bathroom, Oz thought, grinning.

How come I don't get a towel?

You have to share with Spike.  And Giles is out of towels.   Quick image of the bathroom - muddy paw prints and water spattered everywhere, and Xander snorted into his fist, trying not to laugh aloud.

"Oz?" Wesley murmured, and Oz nodded at him and sat on the other side of Spike.  They unconsciously leaned together, touching where they could, and Wesley stared at them for one moment, wide-eyed, and then turned his head to Giles as well.  Spike scrubbed fiercely at his hair and then dropped the towel on Xander's head.  Xander gratefully wiped his own face off and rubbed at his hair, squeezing the ends so it wouldn't drip all down his damp shoulders.  He glanced sidelong at the vampire's wildly spiked hair, wishing he could run his fingers through it.  But that didn't seem quite appropriate, just then.

"Right - all settled then?  To begin - You all seem to remember Wesley - Wesley Wyndam-Price, Tara, also an...an ex-member of the Council and former Watcher for Buffy."  

"She had two?" Tara asked, and Xander had to grin.  A year ago, Tara wouldn't have said a word.

"Yes, she has and - it's a very long story.  We'll discuss it later, if you don't mind.  This is Tara Maclay, Wesley.  She's - she is also a witch."

"I see.  Pleased to meet you, Ms Maclay," Wesley said, smiling faintly.

"T-tara, please, M-mr -"

"Oh, you must call me Wesley - we're all on a first-name basis here, I'm sure," Wesley said, and Tara smiled, ducking her head.  Xander couldn't believe his eyes - or his ears.  Wesley was - totally different, even to the way he held himself, and spoke.

Wonder what the hell's happened to him?  He's -

Not quite the total prat he was?  Wonder why in HELL he's here, and why he just reeks of the poof?   Spike slipped his pack of cigarettes out and lit up, totally ignoring Giles' glare.

"Glad we're all so comfy and friendly-like, but I want to know what the hell is going on, and why it involves Darla and her bloody Irish get."  Spike was staring hard at Wesley, who looked over at Giles.  Giles sighed and nodded.

"The reason you're confused is because - because of this."  Wesley leaned forward, pulling the blanket aside from the bundle in his arms.  A baby's face was revealed, relaxed in sleep.  There was a long moment of silence, and then Buffy leaned forward, smiling.

"A baby?  How does a baby have anything to do with - anything?  Is it a boy or a girl?  It's so cute!"  Buffy was inching closer and Wesley smiled back, turning the baby a little so she could see better.

"It's a boy - his name is Connor and - he's Angel's son.  Angel and Darla's...child."  This time the silence lasted for a full minute, and Buffy just blinked at the infant, then looked up at Giles.              

"Am I on drugs?  Is this whole evening courtesy of Demerol and in a few minutes I'm going to wake up in the hospital with a broken leg or something?"

Oh man, this CANNOT be good, Xander thought, and Oz silently agreed.  A rising tide of irritation was coming from Spike - irritation and anger, and Xander hoped for calm, sent it urgently through the link.

"Vampires can't have babies," Spike said, and his glare was gold-tinged and murderous.  "What in hell are you playing at, Watcher?"

"Ex-watcher, actually," Wesley said mildly, settling back in the chair.  He held the baby comfortably, obviously at ease with his role of care-giver.  "As a rule, you're right; a vampire cannot impregnate anyone or become impregnated.  However - there is a law firm in Los Angeles, called Wolfram and Hart.  They used some...very dark magics to bring Darla back to life.  As a human.  They then somehow convinced Drusilla to turn her into a vampire.  And then - Angel and Darla...  Anyway, Connor was the result.  We still don't actually know - how."  Wesley flicked a glance at Buffy at this.  She was sitting on the edge of the couch, looking lost and a little hurt.  Tara looked as confused as Xander felt, but the glance she sent Buffy's way was full of compassion.

Damn, bet Buffy's hurting...

She'd never have been able to do that with him, anyway - why should she care? Spike asked grumpily.  He took a long drag of his cigarette and plumed the smoke upwards, staring at the ceiling.  

"Darla - killed herself so Connor could be born."

"First time that bitch has ever done something I liked," Spike muttered, and Wesley glanced at him.

"Yes, well - she was very...different, when she was pregnant.  It was interesting."  He paused for a moment, smoothing the blanket over the baby's chest.

"Angel loves his child.  Very much.  But there is a - a prophecy.  It says...the father will kill the son.  I brought Connor here in the hopes that - that I've somehow translated it incorrectly or - or that it's wrong.  If Angel were to harm Connor in any way...  It would kill him."  They were all silent again, considering that, and then the unconscious boy in the couch jerked - coughed - and sat up.

"Where - oh my god!  The Slayer!"  He tried to leap to his feet but tripped himself and fell back, flailing.  Tara flinched away from him and Buffy reached over and grabbed a handful of his shirt - jerked him upright.

"Okay - I know you!  Johnathan!  You were up in the tower, with the gun!  And - you gave me the umbrella at Prom!  So what are you doing running around in the woods looking like a dead girl?" Johnathan blinked at her - swallowed audibly.  He looked a little frantically around the room but everyone was staring stonily back at him, and he put a hand up.

"Now - just wait, okay?  I can - I can explain everything.  It's all - it's all Warren's fault!"

"Warren?  That wanker in the van?  The one who made the robot?"

"Huh?  Yeah - in the van.  He - he made this - cerebral dampener.  It - it makes you do whatever we - whatever he tells you to."

"Just tell me how you killed this girl." Buffy gave Johnathan a shake, gesturing with her free hand and he looked wildly from her to the body on the floor.

"I didn't kill her!  It was Warren!  He hit her!  He - he enslaved her and -"

"Shut. Up."  Buffy leaned in close to the boy and he tried to lean back, sweating and gasping.

"Why did he kill her, and why didn't you stop him."

"He - look, Katrina was his ex - he didn't tell us she was his ex!  We just wanted a girl, you know?  And - and he got her and he was getting all stalker-y with her and then the dampener stopped working and - and she kicked us and she knocked Andrew down and ran..."  Johnathan wiped at his eyes - looked pleadingly around the room.  Spike blew a stream of smoke towards him and he coughed weakly.

"Hey, I've got asthma!  Don't -"

"Finish your story, you pathetic little git," Spike snarled, vamping, and Johnathan let out a little shriek.

"Oh my god!  It is you - it's -"   Spike growled again and he swallowed heavily.  "Okay, okay.  She started to leave - she was getting away and Warren hit her with a bottle of champagne and she fell down..."  Johnathan's voice suddenly dropped to a whisper, and his shoulders slumped.  "And she was dead.  Warren said - said we'd fix it so B-buffy would get the blame."

"You're out of your minds," Xander said, and there was a murmur of agreement from Oz - from Tara.  Giles looked as if Ripper was struggling to be free and Buffy was just staring, openmouthed.  Wesley looked disturbed, and cuddled Connor closer to his chest.

"I can't believe you three - freaks - would kill someone and - and - try to frame me for murder!  I have a little sister, you know!  I - I keep your asses safe from the Hellmouth!"  

"We - we didn't - Warren killed her!  I s-said we should call the police -"  

"And yet - you ended up in the woods, disguised as a dead girl, watching the Slayer think she'd killed someone."  Spike uncoiled gracefully and stalked over to the couch - leaned one hand on the back, his vamp-face inches from Johnathan's.  "You have fucked up, you miserable little tosser.  How are you gonna fix it?"  Johnathan's face was white - utterly bloodless - and his mouth opened and closed soundlessly for several moments.  Buffy let go of his shirt and he shrank as far away from Spike as he could.

"I - I - I'm gonna - call the police?"

"Wrong." Spike reached out and tapped him on the side of the head.  "Try again, braniac."

"I - I'm going to tell you - e-everything about Warren and - and Andrew and...what we've been doing?"

"Good boy," Spike said, and patted Johnathan's cheek hard enough to make his head snap to the side.  He pushed away from the couch and strolled over to the kitchen.  "Fancy a shot, Rupert?" he asked, and Giles sighed.

"I'm going to make some tea, actually -"   Spike opened the cabinet - a different one from the last time - and pulled out a new bottle.  "But please, go ahead and drink my alcohol, I don't need it, I'm sure," Giles grumbled, getting up and shouldering past Spike to the sink.

"Ta, mate," Spike said, and cracked the seal.

Stop that, evil undead,   Xander thought, getting up as well.  Good job with the kid, though.  

Look at him, love - the Niblet could intimidate him.

Dawn's pretty scary, actually, Oz thought, and Xander grinned.  He looked over at Johnathan, who had his head in his hands and was leaning with his elbows on his knees, shoulders shaking.

God, this is - pathetic.  But maybe we can get them to quit with their idiocy now.   He went over to the chair where Wesley was sitting and crouched down next to him.

"So - Wesley.  You - what, work with Angel now?"  Wesley looked down at him, his blue eyes mild behind his glasses.  There were some scars on his knuckles - a small one under his chin - and he just seemed - so much more confident.  Relaxed, and capable.  It was - a good look on him.

You lustin' for the watcher-boy? Spike asked, amused, and Xander suppressed a laugh.

Nah.  He's just - I think he's happy, now.  It's...nice.   He wasn't a bad guy, just - new, you know?  We really gave him a hard time.

If he's workin' for Angel, he probably looks back with longing.  "That right, Watcher, you working for Angel now?" Spike called, and came over to stand behind the man.

"Ex, I said." Wesley looked over his shoulder at Spike, frowning just a little.  Then he looked back at Xander.  "Yes, I'm working for Angel.  We - we do a lot of good.  Help people."

"Who's we? Buffy asked, and Wesley looked up at her and smiled softly.  

"Well, your old friend Cordelia, for one.  And a woman named Winifred Burkle - we call her Fred.  And Charles Gunn."  

"Yeah - Cordy...  We knew she was there...  Is she - doing all right?" Xander asked.

"Quite well, actually.  She - she's the conduit for visions, now.  From the Powers that Be.  She sees bad things happening, and tells us and we -"   Wesley made a little gesture with his hand, smiling.  "We go stop it."

"Really?  Visions?"  Xander mulled this over.  It was hard to imagine Queen C having visions - working for the greater good - but apparently she did.  And the warmth and affection in Wesley's voice when he spoke of her made it clear that she was in good hands.

"Yes, she -" a soft burring interrupted him, and Wesley dug into his pocket and pulled out a cell-phone.  "Excuse me, Xander.  Hello?  Gunn, I - Oh..."  A long pause and Wesley's eyes went wide, and then he slumped in relief.  "Oh, thank god.  What are you...yes...   But don't you think...  Yes, yes, all right.  Are you sure?    Yes - second shelf behind my desk, it's green with a yellow silk ribbon marker.  Yes.  I - I hope Angel understands...  Thank you, Charles...yes, love, see you soon - take care."  Wesley clicked the phone shut and then just sat for a moment, and Xander could see he was shivering slightly.

"Good news, I hope?" Giles asked softly, and Wesley took a deep breath - lifted his head, smiling.

"Yes - very good news.  One of Holtz's soldiers - a woman named Justine - decided to turn traitor.  She told us that the prophecy is a false one.  That a demon - a demon that can move between dimensions as well as time - changed some things so that..."  Wesley took another deep breath and ran one finger lightly along the sleeping baby's cheek.  "It's all right, now.  We know - what's happening.  This Holtz is someone from Angel's - well, Angelus' - past.  He wants revenge.  They're going to find him - stop him."  Wesley seemed on the verge of some emotion and Xander stood and moved away, giving him some privacy.  Spike had gone back to sit next to Oz and now he took another long drink from the bottle he had found and looked speculatively over at the ex-watcher.

"So - you and this Gunn, eh?" he said, and Wesley blushed bright red as every eye in the room suddenly fastened on him with curiosity.

Spike - good god.  We don't care about his sex-life.  Do we?

Well, no.  But it's more fun to talk about than some bloke Angelus managed to piss off.

Why don't we question Johnathan instead?  He needs to tell us lots more about him and the Threesome.   A snort of laughter from Spike and a nod, and Xander looked over at the boy, who was trying hard not to look at the dead girl on the floor.  Tara had, sometime in the last few minutes, gotten a tartan throw off of Giles' couch and draped it over her.

"So - Johnathan.  First question - where's your secret lair?"

"Well, the lair is empty." Buffy said, coming in Giles' door, her shoulders sagging in disappointment.  Spike slipped in behind her, equally put out but for different reasons.  Buffy had been hoping to find Warren and pin Katrina's murder on him.  Spike had just been hoping for some hunting.  They'd left the body there anyway, carefully laying her out as Johnathan had described.  Then they'd called the police and complained about screaming - things being broken - and left a door invitingly open.  With luck, Katrina would be discovered soon.

"I can't believe they left me -" Johnathan mumbled, and Spike reached over and whacked the back of his head.

"Shut it, you.  If I hear that pathetic whine out of your mouth one more time I'm gonna -"

"Please, Spike." Giles held up a hand wearily and Spike subsided, glaring at the boy who cringed away and went to slump on the couch.  Tara and Oz had gone home - Xander had gone by to check on Dawn and Willow, and do a slow drive through Sunnydale, just in case.  Spike could hear him in the link, tired and frustrated.  He hadn't found anything either. Wesley was upstairs with Connor, and the combined scents of his former companions was thick throughout the apartment.  

Drivin' me out of my mind, he thought.  I need to get out of here.

Meet me up the street then, love, and we'll go home.  Nearly dawn, anyway.   Spike nodded to himself and looked over at Giles.

"So, what are we gonna do with the Mini-me, then?"  Giles stared at him, confused.

"The what?  Really, Spike, for a Victorian man you use the oddest terms -"

"Watcher.  Not a man, and not a Victorian anymore.   What are we gonna do with the boy?"

"Ah - ummm...  I - don't really know.  I can't keep him in the bath," with a quick glance at Spike, "and with Wesley and the baby here I really don't have much space at all."  Giles made a small gesture to his sitting room, where Ethan was curled into a sleeping bag on the floor, dead asleep.

"Yeah - you don't.  We're pretty much out of room, too.  Guess he's yours, Slayer."

"Huh?"  Buffy had been sitting at the breakfast bar, head on hands, zoning out with her eyes half-shut.

"The boy - you're gonna take him home and keep him.  See he doesn't do anything stupid."

"What?  But - but I don't -"

"You've got the room, Watcher's got the chains - it'll be fine."

"Chains?"  Johnathan popped up off the couch and stumbled over the edge of a rug - caught himself against the Watcher's desk.  "You can't just - lock me up!  I'm not an -an animal!  I have rights!  I -I should get a phone call and - and a lawyer -"

"This isn't Law and Order, you pillock.  You three have been causing havoc and threatening the Slayer's family."  Spike stalked towards the boy who paled, hunching away.  "You're lucky she doesn't just hand you over to me.  You'll go with her, you'll behave, and you'll keep your hands, eyes, and thoughts off Slayer's little sis.  Understood?"  Spike stood inches from the boy, vamped and snarling, smelling his utter terror.

"Y-y-yes, sir, yes I'll - won't even look, I'll - I'll -"

"Good boy," Spike smirked, patting the rounded, tear-stained cheek and the boy all but fell over trying to get away.

"Really, Spike, is it utterly necessary -"

"Goes faster this way, don't you think?  Xander's waiting on me - I'm off home.  Don't call."  Spike whirled around and strode out, pulling the door to behind him and lighting up as he jogged up the steps and across the parking lot, the rain still falling in slanting lines, cool on his face.  Xander's truck was idling at the end of the block and he slid into the seat - cuddled close and got a long, sweet kiss from the human.

Always taste so good, always smell so good, love.  Xander's fingers curled into his hair and pulled him a little closer, and he sighed happily as Spike let the purr rumble up to audibility.

You do too, Spike...god...want you...   Spike let his mouth trail down, kissing over Xander's jaw and then throat and he felt him yawn.

"You're so tired, love.   Let's go home and get you in bed."

"But I want to feel you, Spike - want you in me..."  Xander protested, and then yawned again, and Spike chuckled into his neck.

"Here's what we'll do, love.  We'll get home and take a shower, right?  Get all warm and clean.  And then we'll slip into bed..."  Spike got his hand under the edge of Xander's shirt and stroked the lean belly and ribs - let his fingers dip down under the waist of Xander's jeans and Xander sighed softly.  "And I'll slip into you, love...  And you can just sleep, love, just drift away and I'll stay in you all night, all morning..."  Xander shuddered, breathing in sharply, and his eyes flashed green at Spike, wide and wicked.

"You can do that, Spike?"

Course I can, Spike thought, kissing Xander's throat again - rasping his tongue over the scar so that Xander twisted, his hips rocking up into Spike's hand.

God...fuck yeah.  Let's go.  Spike smiled, and settled himself so that he was touching all of Xander that he could, and they drove through the darkness, the rain ticking and sliding over the glass.

Two days later Buffy came into the Magic Box, looking pissed off.

"Well, Johnathan's gone.  The little bastard."  Xander looked up in surprise at her tone - at bastard, because Buffy rarely said anything like that.

"Gone how?  What happened?"

"His little rat-fink friends came for him.  They had some demon - I think that Andrew can call them or something.  Anyway, I was fighting it off and they got him loose - took off."

"Jesus.  You okay?  Is Dawn -?"

"She wasn't home."  Buffy slumped down into a chair, watching Xander listlessly as he put the last touch on a bookshelf for Giles.  Xander watcher her out of the corner of his eye as he swept up sawdust and tidied - moved the empty shelf into position under the loft staircase.  She took a sharp breath, suddenly, and her eyes closed.

"Buffy - you all right?" he asked, and Buffy looked up at him and there was something...shining...  Something so tangible...  It was as if -

"I'm - fine.  I just...  Sometimes?  When I feel really...lost...it's like...  There's a tug.  A kind of little - pull.  To get my attention, maybe?  And it feels like...  It feels like mom is kissing me again, like she did when I was...in heaven."  Buffy's fingers had been resting lightly on her sternum, where Xander had seen that insubstantial rope of mist and witch-fire stretching away to nothing.

The tether. Is that what it really is?  She's still - connected - to heaven?   The thought shook him, and he went slowly over to a chair and sank down.   Buffy watched him, smiling just a little, her eyes glimmering.

"Do you think - it might be?" she asked, and Xander couldn't help it - he laughed.

"Buffy - considering it's you?  I'm sure it is."  He just grinned at her then, because she looked happy, and that was nice.  She grinned back.

"I can't believe it's going to be Christmas so soon...  Do you think...  Could you guys take Dawn for - for the day after and...up until New Years, maybe?"  Xander widened his eyes in surprise at her.  

"You planning on a vacation?"  Buffy looked anxious for a moment and then sighed, looking down.

"Okay...  You can tell me I'm being an idiot all you want...  But Angel calls Wesley every day - like, five times a day!   Checking on Conner.  And - and sometimes we talk.  And...  They'll have this Holtz guy out of the picture by Christmas.  Half of his people are gone or - well, Angel says sent back, and I'm not sure what that means but...  Anyway, he wants me to come down to L.A.  He wants...  Wants me to spend some time with him and Conner."  Buffy looked - well, Xander couldn't really tell how Buffy looked.  Eager?  Happy?  Nauseous?  She was poking at a book, turning the pages, fiddling with the ribbon marker and Xander reached out and touched her hand.

"Hey - whatever you want to do is fine, Buff.  You know that.  I'm not gonna - not gonna tell you you're crazy or anything.  You know - well...  You know I don't like Angel but that's kinda my problem."  Buffy nodded, still staring at the book.  She sighed a little, making a face.

"I really think - I don't think I can ever feel about him like I did, you know?  And I'm pretty sure it's the same for him.  But it's like - we've been through the same things and - shared so much...  And I don't have to put up a front with him, you know?"  Xander nodded silently, wincing a little.  Willow - still prodded at Buffy to 'get happy'.  Still wanted to act as if what she'd done meant nothing at all.  Oh, she said she was sorry - had baked cookies and gotten all sniffley, even.  But her eyes told a different story - her eyes said 'praise me, see me, thank me, love me', and though they were all willing to do some of those things, they weren't willing to do all of them, and Willow...just couldn't grasp that.  She was spending more and more time with Amy, and Dawn said she was doing - a lot of magic.  Said she acted weird sometimes, like she was drunk. But she didn't smell like alcohol.  It was making them all nervous, and Giles had stepped up his plans to get her to England - to the coven that he said could help.  

"Buffy...  I think it's great.  If Angel - if you can talk to him and feel...  I dunno - happy, or - or at least, not unhappy, then - that's great.  I think you should do it.  And yeah, we'll keep Dawn, you know we will."  

Buffy looked up at him finally, and the troubled look on her face melted into a huge smile - a Buffy-smile from years ago, when the world hadn't been so hard, and so cold, and the death and despair and just plain ugliness of her life hadn't mounted up as high as the sky.  Xander smiled back, and they both jumped up at Giles plaintive call for help and went to help the older man with the stack of books he was struggling with.  They shelved cracked volumes of demon lore and esoteric magic until twilight, when Spike cat-prowled in, looking for a kiss and something to kill.  And Buffy just laughed, and invited them out on patrol.

12 Hidden

Xander came awake abruptly and he lay in the bed, frozen, searching for what had roused him.  

Bed's empty...Spike was IN bed - Spike?  Love, where -   He sent his awareness out along the link, searching.  And Spike - wasn't there.   Well, he was there, but it was that strange, fuzzy blank that was him when he was -

Forgetting.  Spike's forgetting.  Fuck, where IS he?   Xander scrambled out of bed and into his robe - went rapidly and silently down the hall.  Sleep-thoughts from Oz, silence from Dawn's room where Tara lay.  He caught the faint glow of light from the corner of his eye and was going down the stairs before he made the conscious decision.  At the foot of the stairs he stopped dead and stared.

Spike was sitting at the desk - his desk.  The one Xander had secretly made for him, and given to him at Solstice.  Sitting with his hair sleep-tousled, paper spread before him.  His brocade robe wrapped tightly around him, a candelabrum of candles burning at the corner.  The glasses - the prop ones he'd used to 'dress up' for his bet with Dawn - were clutched in his right hand, and he leaned on it, staring down.  His left hand held a pen and he was writing rapidly, his lips moving a little.   He looked -

Looks like when he was human.  Like his own memory in his head of himself.  Like William.  Harris, what's going on?  We can't have this - fragmentation.

He's not fragmented, for fuck's sake -     "Taisbean," he whispered, because he had to know, and maybe that would help.   And Spike was there, shining like fire and sunlight together.  The demon and the human soul more closely entwined than they ever had been - one entity.  But the sparks were duller - blacker - and there were shadows like dapples all through the pale-gold of the soul's bodies.  Through Spike's head, and Xander felt his stomach knot in dread and horror.  The shadows were faint, but they were there.  Xander took a moment to take a deep breath - another.  His heart was pounding and he felt...ill.  He wiped his hands on his robe and walked slowly over to the vampire, who glanced up at him, flash of confused blue.

"Spike?  What're you doing, love?  Don't you want to come to bed?"

"I really just need to get this down, before I forget," Spike replied, and Xander blinked.  Perfect diction - like Giles.  And no recognition.  Xander swallowed heavily, his fear ratcheting up a notch.

"Spike?  What are you writing?  Can you tell me?"

"Oh, I -"   Eyes up again, so confused, and Spike smiled at him, tiny little nervous smile.  "I really have a terrible head for this sort of thing.  I forget much too easily.  All my tutors have said so.  So I thought - I'll write it all down and then..."  Another nervous smile and he pushed his hand back through his hair - winced when the glasses tangled in it.  He pulled them free and put them down.  "And you know, these are not - correct.  Someone is playing a joke on me, I really do -"   Spike stopped, staring at his hand, which had a cut across the top courtesy of that night's patrol and a fresh coat of black polish on the nails.  And a ring he'd recently acquired, a silver band with a Grecian-looking 'X' design all around it.  He looked up sharply at Xander.  And the link snapped open wide, a torrent of confusion and fear and anger - desperation.

"Why am I...?  Xander?"   Spike's face was a mask of bewilderment and the link surged with fear - with black, skittering things of thoughts that Spike shoved hard away.  Xander crouched down beside him, his hands on thigh and shoulder, helping Spike push the confusion away, anchoring him with:

Safe, you're safe, I'm here - you're home and I came looking for you, you were writing - Spike, my Spike, I'm here, you're safe - Family, family, pack - safe!   There was a noise on the stairs and:

Pack! Pack protect pack, pack - SpikeXanSpike safe safe  Sleep muddled thought from Oz and then the werewolf was there as well, crouching next to Xander, hand on Xander's back - on Spike's - and Spike was slipping out of the chair and down onto the floor with them, reaching out and getting Xander's hand and Oz's in a bone-crushing grip.

"Xander - Xander I was - I couldn't remember and I was - gonna write it down and - and he remembered, but I didn't want - Xander, I can't remember!"  Spike was shivering hard and Xander pulled him close, getting Spike's robe-tie loose and his own in quick movements so they could touch skin to skin.  Oz got behind, adding his own heat to Spike's back, pulling the edges of Xander's robe around Spike's back as far as he could.  Hugging as hard as Xander was, and rubbing his nose into the short hairs at the nape of Spike's neck.  His own soul glowing an ashy-rose, the wolf a specter inside it, all lunar-white and black.  Sparks of silver and fire-red, of black and green.  

Pack protect pack love you love you, from Oz, and Love you LOVE you, mine, my own, safe here, always, from Xander, fierce and loud, straight at Spike.

"What were you trying to remember, love?  Tell me and I'll help you," Xander murmured, his own face in the opposite side of Spike's neck, and Spike shuddered, panting.

"Was - was thinking about the first Christmas I had with Dru and the Angelus and all...  And I c-couldn't remember it -"

"Shhh, it's okay.  I can remember it.  I've got it.  Here - here, love -"   Xander thought hard, dredging up Spike's earliest memories as a vampire and the scene came to him, finally.

Crowded London streets, bustle of parties and theatricals and weddings at every turn.  Good food being cooked, and Wassail; the scents spilling out of every home, thick as cream in the cold, damp air.  The people - out and about, so warm and so wonderful, full of life and wine.  Snow like black icing over everything, filthy with street-muck but still white and pretty here and there and William, standing under a gas light, flakes falling into his open, upturned mouth - into his eyes.  And he can see - he can see the snow falling down from miles above and it's like looking up at the stars only they're moving and whirling and dancing.  And he laughs, catching Dru around the waist.

"Is this what it's like, Dru?  Is this what you see?  The stars all dancing and the world turning like a top?"  And Dru is laughing too, kissing him with her cold, apple-cider mouth, her fingers in his like frozen twigs, her hair satin and spice under his palm and Angelus calls impatiently, lifting Darla up into a hansom, smiling even though he's trying to be stern...

"There love, see?  I've got it all, I remember, and now you remember, right?"  Xander combed his fingers through and through Spike's hair - felt Spike's arms tighten around him and then relax marginally.

"Yeah, I...  We went to see a play and - there was this little girl selling posies outside, Angelus bought some for Dru and Darla and then Dru wanted to take the girl home, give her a happy Christmas..."  The rest of that memory was sharp and clear; the table heaped with meat and pies and sweets, the girl drowsy and smiling and incredulous at her luck, and her blood like pale rose wine on Spike's tongue...

Xander hugged Spike hard and then slowly sat back - pulled Spike's robe shut, to keep him warm.

"You all right now?" he asked, and Spike sat back on his heels and tugged Oz around to where he could see him.

"Yeah, I'm...  We've got to fix this, Xan.  This is - bad."

"I know.  We'll - we'll go talk to Giles... Damnit!"

"Yeah," Oz said, and they huddled there for a moment in silence.  Tomorrow, Giles and Ethan were going with Wesley back to L.A.  Holtz was dead, the crisis was over, and Angel was missing his son.  And Wesley thought he might have a book or two that would help Ethan, so they had decided on a little trip.  Everyone was gathering to see them off around noon from the shop.

"Well, we'll - get there a little early and maybe - mention it, and they can think about it on their trip.  Maybe Wesley will have some ideas."

"Yeah.  Maybe."  Spike sighed and scrubbed his hands back through his hair - looked at them both and the link was thick with anger and agitation.  Spike - hated being vulnerable.  Hated doing this to his family.

You're not DOING anything to us, Spike, we're fine - it's FINE.

I can't protect you if I'm goin' round the bend now can I?  Can't do a damn thing if I'm - if I'm off in the damn corner or -  A flurry of images - Dru at her absolute worst, when it took the combined efforts of Darla and Angelus to hold her down so Spike could force laudanum down her throat.  Tara, mindlessly rocking and crying, yelling at Willow and hiding from all of them those awful weeks when she'd lost her mind to Glory.

"It's not like that, Spike!  God, it's - you're not crazy, you're not gonna go crazy, you just - there's some damage, you know?  That's all.  And we can fix it.  It's just - aftermath. "   Xander pulled him close again, wanting to protect him from his fear - wanting to fix it, and Spike laughed shortly, snuggling close - pulling Oz into the embrace and just leaning there with them, breathing in long breaths, calming himself.

Family.  We're here, all of us...  Safe now.  Got to - figure this out and then we'll be fine...  Fuckin' Hellmouth -

I know, love, I know - I talked to Manny.  He's talking to his son - Seattle could be sooner than we think.

Lots of woods up there, Oz thought, and there was something there - something to do with Derio, and running under the moon, under a thick canopy of leaves and stars and Xander jerked away a little, staring at Oz.

"Oz?  Jesus, are you - is he...?"

"He wants to be the wolf too, love?" Spike breathed, shock awe love you love you in the link, and Oz ducked his head - looked back up at them, smiling a little.

"He talks about it. He...says he doesn't feel like it would...hurt him.  He says...  I dunno.  We talk about it."

"God, Oz...  That's...   Is it - do you want to?"

Oz shrugged, pack love you safe forever.   "I don't - know.  I could, if he really wanted me to.  I just - have to know that he does..."  Spike leaned over and kissed him, soft and sweet, and Oz sighed and leaned into him - into Xander.  He smelled of incense and lemon and blood, just faintly - smelled of sweat and earth and magic and Xander had to kiss him too, smiling.

"Whatever you decide, whatever you want - just...ask, just - you know -"   Love you LOVE you, family always always.

"I know," Oz said, and they stayed like that for a minute or so, until Spike shivered all over and Xander stifled a yawn.

"Time for bed then, my loves.  Nearly dawn," Spike murmured, and he rose fluidly, pulling the others up, and they made their way upstairs.  As they came to the head of the steps Tara poked her head out of the bedroom, looking muzzily at them.  She was soft greens and browns and golds, sparks like fireflies all around her, a shadowy figure of a woman inside and behind her that was, Xander thought, her mother.  Or the memory of her mother, that guided and helped her, and kept her safe.  Tara's own soul always looked - serene.  

"All right?" she whispered, and Oz touched her cheek, going on to his own room.

"We're fine.  Tell you in the morning," he said, and she nodded.  She looked over at Spike and Xander, head a little to one side.

"Fine.  Swear it, Glinda.  Go on back to bed?"

"Okay.  Tomorrow, boys," she said, best mother-hen voice and they all chuckled softly.  Oz opened his door and slipped inside, a sleepy query from Derio audible to all, and Tara ducked back, shutting her own door.  Xander pulled Spike closer to him, wanting Spike to lean on him, wanting to do something...

"Love you, Xander."

"Love you too..."  Xander whispered, and they shed robes and climbed into bed.  Spike curled himself around Xander, holding him tight enough to almost hurt, face in Xander's neck and breathing him in, tasting him with tiny, damp kisses to his neck - to the scar.

"Love - want you in me, Xander, want you to...fuck me and show me... us, show me..."   My soul, show me what I am, make me real.

"You're real, love, you're so real and you're here and you're -"  Safe and mine, mine always, my vampire, love you forever, love you -  Xander turned so he was on top, covering Spike, kissing him and touching him, making him feel every part of his body, making him know he was there and it was all real.  The slow slide of his body into Spike's was shivery delight, and Xander moved with deliberation, making all his moves at half-speed, making it last.  The seeing made a glow of gold and crimson and pale topaz all around them - made Spike into some sort of ethereal creature - angel, demon, it didn't matter - he was beautiful, he was shimmering with light and with shadow, with his love and his happiness and Xander fed it through the link, opened wide to it and made Spike see and never once let his gaze leave Spike's.  They'd both have bruises in the morning, from being held so tightly, but they didn't care - welcomed the pain as another part of reality - welcomed the bruises as proof.  So they wouldn't forget.

They left for the shop around eleven, Xander yawning every other minute, Oz looking dazed.  The spill-over in the link had kept him and Derio up as well, although Xander didn't think the werewolf minded too much.  Spike was already at the shop, having gone via Sunnydale Below, and Derio leaned sleepily on Oz's shoulder, his fiddle-case in one hand, his other twined with Oz's.

Another wolf in the family.  That would be - would Derio be part of the link, then?  Would it work that way?

Dunno, love.  Have to think about that.  Oh, buggering hell!

What is it?

Fucking bastards...

Spike?   Xander made a turn and pulled into a parking lot.  He was going to run into the grocery store and get some sort of breakfast-type things.  Pastries.  Fruit.  Juice.  Tara had had an early class and had left twenty dollars and a note - "Nothing left for breakfast here - we need to go shopping!  Maybe bring some stuff by the Magic Box - we can have a little brunch?  No Pop-Tarts for me, please!"   Xander would do his best to accommodate the health-minded witch but this grocery made its own éclairs and tarts and he wasn't going have a melon-cup for his breakfast.

Watcher and the other Watcher and the mage went for coffee and something - some 'essential travel' item.   Spike's mental tone took on a pompous sort of 'Giles' sound, and Xander sniggered to himself, avoiding the narrow-eyed glance the stock-boy was giving him.

So?  You can snoop around in Giles' office and stuff.

They left Connor here!  The bastards.   An image of the sleeping baby made Xander laugh again, and he hastily stifled it.

He's asleep!  You'll be fine.  He's your - nephew, after all.  Or is he your half-brother?  What IS he?

He's the unluckiest bloody kid in the universe.  I don't know what he is.  He'd better STAY asleep, Spike grumbled, and Xander sent him a mental pet, stepping up to the counter in his turn at the bakery.

Halfway to the shop and Xander and Oz both stiffened in startlement at a blast of irritation and - could it be fear? - through the link.

Spike!  Fuck's sake -!

Sodding HELL, Xan, I dropped something an' he woke up!  He's screaming like a banshee!  Get here quick!

I'll be there in - ten minutes, love - Xander couldn't suppress the amusement in this thoughts - couldn't stop the laughter as Oz relayed the problem to Derio, and the irritation from Spike jumped up a notch.

Ten minutes!  Christ -

Pick him up and rock him, Oz thought, and the thought that came back was incendiary.  Abruptly, Spike shut the link down.

"Oh crap.  Well - he'll be all right.  And if Conner really does cry for ten minutes...  It won't hurt him."  Oz just smiled, thinking of his own nephew and the babysitting he'd done once, long ago.  The nephew who'd bit him and turned him into a werewolf.  There was a moment's uneasy speculation.

"Hey, Xander, if you go left here and then - well, go faster, we'll get there a little quicker."

"Right," Xander said.    Derio fumbled his seat-belt on and Oz had a death-grip on the breakfast.

When they screeched to a stop outside the Magic Box, Giles, Ethan and Wesley were all about a half-block away, walking leisurely towards the shop, Giles with a holder full of cups in his hands.  They saw Xander, Oz and Derio piling out of the truck and immediately started walking fast - Wesley actually breaking into a trot.

"What is it?  Did Spike -"

"Spike didn't do anything.  It's just - Connor was crying and -"

You lot shut it.  He's quiet now and if you wake him I won't be best pleased, Spike said, the link suddenly there again, and Xander held up a hand.

"Wait - it's okay.  Spike said to be quiet."

"I really do wish you'd tell me more about this link, Xander -" Wesley started, and Xander grinned at Oz and they all filed into the shop.   Spike was sitting on the loft stairs, his legs together and Connor lying on his back along Spike's thighs, his head at Spike's knees.  The vampire was slowly swinging his legs back and forth, one hand splayed carefully on the baby's belly, the other holding a book.  He was reading, in a soft and steady, rumbling voice, and Connor was making small, sleepy noises like a drowsy kitten.

"The boy's eyes grew bright.  "Bull Run, ask him Bull Run..."

"I was there." Softly.

"What about Shiloh?"

"There's never been a year in my life I haven't thought, what a lovely name and what a shame to see it only on battle records."

"Shiloh, then.  Fort Sumter?"

"I saw the first puffs of powder smoke."  A dreaming voice.  "So many things come back, oh, so many things.  I remember songs.  'All's quiet along the Potomac tonight, where the soldiers lie peacefully dreaming; their tents in the rays of the clear autumn moon, or the light of the watchfires, are gleaming.'  Remember, remember..."  Spike's eyes came up from the page to Xander's, storm-murk blue, the link troubled but quiet.

"Oh, well - that's -" Wesley sank down onto a chair by the round table, his eyes on Connor.

"That's bloody typical, reading to a child about battles..." Giles grumbled, but he moved almost silently over to the counter, putting the tray of coffee-cups down.  Ethan made a face after him, smiling.

"Don't pretend you didn't thrill to the gore of Charlemagne and King Arthur yourself, Ripper," he chuckled, and Giles shot him an amused glance, lifting cup-lids to check what was inside.

"Why can't they mark these things?" he muttered, and Ethan went to help.

"Do you think I can pick him up?" Oz asked, and Spike looked down at the baby, tipping his head to one side a little.

"Probably.   Give it a go, then."  He shut the book - something he'd been reading on and off - and tucked it into a duster pocket while Oz crossed to him and set the bags of breakfast food down - carefully scooped Connor up.  The baby yawned hugely, his eyes drifting shut, and Oz sat down carefully next to Wesley.  Derio moved next to him, leaning on the table and smiling down at the pudgy face.

"How'd you like playing daddy?" Xander asked, sitting down in front of Spike and leaning back.  Spike's thighs fell open and he leaned forward, his forearms loosely crossed over Xander's collarbones.

"I'll play daddy with you, love," Spike said, nibbling at Xander's jaw, sending something truly pornographic through the link and Xander flushed, hardening in his jeans and trying not to just turn around and jump Spike right there.

"Fuck.  Spike, you...are so evil," he whispered, and Spike kissed him, slow and thorough.  It did not help.

They eventually moved to the training room, where Xander and Derio and Ethan spread out breakfast food and coffee on an old library table and started eating - Xander mostly éclairs, Derio mostly fruit, and Spike making leering suggestions about both.  Wesley had Connor in his car-seat and was idly rocking it with his foot, sipping coffee and trying not to smear powdered sugar on a copy of some book or other that Giles was showing him.  The door-bell jangled and Giles glanced up.

"That would be Buffy, I suppose," he said, and jerked in startlement when Spike leapt to his feet, game face and growling.

"No, it's bloody well not."

"Angel?" Wesley said, spitting sugar.  "Gunn?"

"Wesley, you are in so much trouble," Cordelia said, somewhere behind the two hulking men in the doorway.   Xander couldn't help it, he laughed.

"Well, this is in no way...awkward," Wesley said, getting to his feet and looking around helplessly for somewhere to put his coffee and cake.

"Wesley -"   The man who was apparently Gunn; a tall, broad black man with a shaven head stalked across the room, frowning.  Straight for Wesley.

"Gunn, we -"

"He's been working up a head of steam the whole trip," Cordelia said, coming around Angel finally.  A bulging baby bag hung from her shoulder.

"But - we worked all this out on the phone..." Wesley said, eyeing Gunn with misgiving and Xander could have sworn this Gunn growled.

"He decided to be pissed instead," Angel said.  He looked uneasily at Spike and then at Gunn, who was a foot from Wesley.  Then he looked at Connor and his whole face lit up in a smile, and he went forward, kneeling down beside the car seat.  Xander blinked, amazed at what the smile did to Angel.

Never saw THAT before.

Too happy to be brooding, usually.   Spike let the demon go and leaned back on the exercise horse, watching Wesley and Gunn.

"Don't ever do anything like this again," Gunn barked, and then he grabbed Wesley and pulled him into a kiss that was broken only by Dawn squealing from the back doorway.

"Oh my god!"

"Old home week," Cordelia said, smiling.

"Bit!  You're supposed to be in school!"  

"Teacher's day, Spike, we got off early.  Buffy and Willow are gonna be here in about ten minutes.  Who is that?"   Xander thought fast.

"Wes?  Uh - Wes - Gunn?  Hey?"  Gunn pulled away from Wes long enough to whip his head around and glare at Xander and the hyena growled.  "Hey!  Uh - I'm Xander.  Right over there - see that?  Stairway to the roof.  Nice and private.  Wanna - show Wes the roof?"  Gunn opened his mouth - looked at the sea of faces that were staring at him.  Looked at Dawn and winced.

"Right.  Roof.  Let's go."  He wheeled Wesley around and frog-marched him to the door and through it, but Xander saw the smile on Wesley's sugar-flecked mouth.

"Okay, and - Connor's sleeping so maybe the reunion should be up front?" Xander made a shooing motion at Dawn and she bounced over to Cordelia.

"My god!  I love your hair!  Are those Prada?  Tell me all about L.A.!"  Oz was gathering food, and Derio was, and Giles, and they all slipped away to the front of the room as Angel leaned over Connor's car seat and gently lifted his son out.

"Little man," he crooned, cradling the sleeping baby close, and Xander put his hand over Spike's mouth and dragged him to the basement steps.

"We're just gonna go down here for - a few minutes -"   Spike grabbed his arm and yanked and Xander just managed to slam the door shut behind them.

"We should go up," Xander murmured, kissing Spike's neck, licking away the trace of blood there.

"Mmmmm..."  Spike's fangs were still in Xander's throat - he was still sipping miniscule amounts of blood from him and Xander shivered and sighed, leaning into Spike's chest, clenching his body around Spike's cock.

Tara's here, from Oz, amusement and fondness, and Xander sighed.

"They'll wanna go, love..."

Let them go.  Don't care.  They can all bloody go,   Spike thrust up ever so slightly, holding Xander down, and Xander shifted, gasping.

"Love, please - I need..."

"'Course you do, love.  Like you in my lap like this..." Spike whispered, going back to his leisurely sucking, the link dark and throbbing with images.

That is so wrong, Spike.  Daddy?  Just wrong.

Tell your cock that, Spike thought, amused and breathless and starting to pant, just a little, and Xander let his head fall forward onto Spike's neck - let the link and the dual physical sensations wash over him - fill him - make him moan and shiver.   Spike flexed upward; harder, faster, and a moment later he was trembling, his jaws locked down hard on Xander's throat, his body arching into orgasm.

Love you love you, fucking god that's lovely...

"Spike," Xander whispered, breathless, and Spike's fingers eased up from their pinching grasp on Xander's cock.  A moment later Xander was lying over a pile of boxes and Spike's mouth was on him, sucking hard, and he bit the fingers that Spike pushed into his mouth, crying out softly as Spike swallowed him down.

"F-fuck -" Xander gasped, and Spike leaned over him and kissed him, salt and blood and musk.

"Nice and neat, that way," Spike said, grinning, and he stood up, stretching hard.

"Not that neat.  I think I left a roll of paper towels down here -"   Xander sat up slowly as Spike rooted around, finally tossing him a roll of towels and then his jeans.

"Best get dressed, love - want to say goodbye, don't you?"

"Oh, fuck off," Xander had to grin as he pulled his underwear and jeans on - as they both found their shirts and stamped their boots on.   They clattered up the stairs and at the top Spike grabbed Xander around the waist and gave him one last, spine-melting kiss.

Love you always, mine always always.

Always yours, love you...  

Sodding Angel -

"Ah - he's all wrapped up in Connor, you know?  Don't worry about him," Xander whispered, and opened the door.

Everyone was there; Tara was alternating finishing off the last of the strawberries and talking softly to Willow, who looked radiantly happy.  Giles was patting his pockets, looking distracted, and Ethan was watching with amusement as Dawn went through a small photo-album.  Buffy was sitting next to Angel, talking quietly while Angel rocked the baby. It had taken longer than anyone could have guessed to get rid of Holtz, and now Buffy and Angel were making new plans for a visit - sometime after Anya's wedding, probably.

"Xander!  These pictures are so cute!  Connor looks like Superman in this one 'cause Angel's invisible -"  Dawn waved the album and Xander came over to the girls, watching out of the corner of his eye as Spike stalked around the edges of the room and settled half-way up the loft stairs, searching for his cigarettes.

"Here, let me look.  You - you look great, Cordy," Xander said, glancing at the pictures.  Cordelia did look good, and she projected an air of confidence - of businesslike intelligence - that had been missing from the more brittle and secretly insecure 'Queen C.'

"Thanks, Xan.  So - you and Spike.  I just had to see it to believe it."

"Yeah.  It's...the best thing that ever happened to me, Cordy.  It's - been amazing."  Cordelia looked at him, her head a little to one side, and then she smiled that million-dollar smile.

"Yeah.  I can tell.  You look - great.  Even with the long hair, you look - just...great."  Xander smiled back - looked down at another picture of Connor, nodding his head to Dawn's excited chatter.

"Well - we'll be back some time on Monday, Tara.  I trust you and Willow and - and Dawn will keep things going smoothly?"

"Don't worry Giles - we'll be fine!" Willow said, patting Tara's hand gently, and Tara smiled at her.

"I h-have the number for the H-hyperion, Giles, but we won't n-need anything," Tara said.  Anya and Drake were at some sort of weekend retreat, a 'relationship building' thing that Anya had read about.  Something she thought they should do before the wedding.  Drake had confided to Spike and Xander during a patrol that he was going because the place was a spa and he could lie in hot mud or bubbling springs all weekend and have sex, because Anya was sure that sex in new places was the way to marital bliss.

"Works for me," Drake had said happily, tweezering a strand of demon gut off of Spike's shoulder and studying it intently under his flashlight beam.

"Right, so - we're off, then.  Don't hesitate to call if you -"

"Leave it, Ripper.  They'll be fine," Ethan laughed, tugging Giles' arm and Giles smiled sheepishly, gathering up a jacket from the counter.

A few minutes slow exodus and then the cars were driving away; Giles and Ethan in the convertible, Angel's crew in an SUV whose windows were so darkly tinted Xander was surprised it was legal.  A brief honk of the SUV's horn and they were gone.  Everyone but Spike stood on the sidewalk just outside the shop.

"Well - that's that, then," Buffy said, looking around with a bit of a deflated air.  "I guess I'm gonna go home.  Stuff to do like - laundry, and dishes..."  Buffy looked bummed out and Tara gave her a brief hug.

"Willow and Dawn are having a movie night tonight, why not meet me and we'll have d-dinner?"

"Hey!  That'd be great.  Thanks, Tara!"  Buffy grinned and then spun on one foot to stare at Dawn.

"You.  Be good.  Help them, don't break anything, don't mouth off to any customers, and don't read the books!"  Dawn rolled her eyes.

"Buffy - I'm almost sixteen.  I think I'll be safe at the Magic Box with Tara and Willow.  Geez."  Dawn flounced back inside, crossing over to Spike.  He was still sprawled on the steps and he leaned forward, saying something to her.

"I'll be in around four, okay?" Oz said, and Tara nodded as he and Derio wandered off down the street.  Derio was trying some solo things, and he'd go play in the park, just practicing and fooling around, sometimes with Oz playing his guitar.  They'd made thirty-seven dollars one day last week, totally unintentionally.

Xander followed the girls back into the shop and Spike shot him a leering grin.

"I think we'll just go home.  I've got a piece I'm working on -" Xander said, and Tara nodded and smiled, reaching for the phone that was already ringing.            

Woodcarving?  Can think of a better way to spend a day off, love, Spike thought, easing down off the stairs and gliding towards him.

Had some other kind of...artwork in mind.  That whole Daddy thing - that was wrong.  And bad.  And you need to be punished for making me think it.

And for making you get off to it, Spike added, getting around behind him and sliding his hands over Xander's belly.

That too.  So - get home, get naked, get out - oh - some rope and...

And let the artist work, Spike sighed happily, nibbling on the claim scar, and then he was gone, down the stairs and out into Sunnydale Below.  Xander waved distractedly at the girls and headed for his truck, hoping he could concentrate well enough to stop at every stop sign.

"Xander?  Xander - Oz - are you guys home?"  Xander jerked awake, lifting his head with a snap from Spike's chest.  Spike was scrambling off the bed, growling, and Xander followed him, stumbling over a coil of discarded rope.

"Hey!  I need help!"  It was Buffy and Xander grabbed his robe, yanking it on.  Spike didn't bother - was already out the bedroom door and pounding down the stairs.

"Slayer - what the hell?"

"It's Dawn and Willow - they should have been home ages ago but they're not and I can't find them and -"

"What in hell is the Bit doing out with -"

"Spike!  Don't."  Xander caught himself on the newel post, staring at Buffy who was oblivious to the naked vampire not three feet from her.  A vampire criss-crossed with mostly-healed cuts.  "Buffy - just, go slow."  Buffy took a deep breath - nodded, shutting her eyes for a moment.

"Okay.  Dawn and Willow were going to a movie tonight.  And they left around six.  And - the movie was supposed to be over right around nine.  But they're not home.  It's almost one, and they're not home, and nobody's called!  Tara and I - she went to Giles...   We saw Oz and Derio, out at - at the Bronze and I asked them to look.  I think -" Buffy stopped, biting her lip.

"What, Buff?"

"That Amy?  The rat?  She was in the house today.  I had to run out and get some laundry soap and when I got back she was - snooping around.  Trying to find spell components, or that's what she told me.  She said - she and Willow had been going to this guy, called Rack?  Spike - do you know him?"

"Yeah.  He - buys and sells magic.  You can't get addicted to magic but you can get addicted to what he does. He - gives you a rush and he takes some of your energy."

God - why would Willow DO that?

She thinks it's makin' her stronger.  It's just - opening her up to the dark side of things.   Spike turned and put his fist through the wall, and then he looked at Buffy, game-face.

"If Red took Dawn there - I'll kill her, Slayer."  He spun on his heel and pelted upstairs, and Xander held out a hand, stopping Buffy from whatever she was going to say.

"I know.  Don't.  Let me get dressed and we'll go.  Do you know where this Rack - is?"

"No - Amy said his place is hidden - it moves around.  He gives you a key.  Willow had the key they were using."

"Fuck."  Xander turned and ran as well, and they were dressed and gone in minutes.  

"It could be any bloody where, that's the point," Spike snapped, and Buffy opened her mouth to say something back and then stopped.

"God, just - is there anything?  Anything at all?"

"No," Spike said shortly, and then relented, seeing Buffy's eyes widen and then sparkle, filling with tears.  "Listen - Oz says nothing - he's coming back up, gonna try near the docks.  Xander says -"

Nothing.  There's nothing.  Is there anybody we could ask?

That Amy bint might talk if I put the screws to her, Spike thought, and he felt the hesitation in the link - felt Xander weighing that option, and Oz.

Only if we have to.  I'm gonna come back around to where you are, Xander thought, and Spike nodded absently.

"Xander's coming back this way.  Let's -"   They both stopped, listening, as not-too-distant car-tires squealed sharply, someone braking or turning too fast.  A moment later there was a scream.

"Dawn!"  Buffy took off running and Spike loped after her, game-face, scenting the wind.

Xan, she's here!  We're -going towards that bridge -   Spike sent the image to Xander and Oz - scented magic on the night air, and blood, and demon.   Something that should not be in Sunnydale, despite the presence of the Hellmouth.

Dawn's blood, fucking HELL-

Just find her!  I'm coming -

Coming, from Oz, getting stronger.   And Spike ran.

Dawn was crawling, screaming, kicking ineffectually at the demon that was crouching over her, grinning.  Buffy didn't hesitate - she plowed into it, rolling with it over and over and Spike swooped down on Dawn, gathering her up out of the dirt.

"Dawnie - Niblet, it's all right, I'm here -"   Dawn whimpered, flinching, and Spike pulled back a little, looking at her.  There were claw marks over her cheek - blood down her face from a gash on her forehead.  And she was holding her left arm awkwardly.

"What hurts, love?  Tell me what hurts."

"Spike!  S-spike...god...m-my head hurts and my - my arm, I can't m-move my fingers -"   Spike shushed her, pulling her close.  

"Just let me look, poppet, shhh..."  He ghosted his fingers over her forearm, feeling the muscles as tight as wire, vamping for a moment to use every sense he had.  "Think it's broken, love.  Now you come here -"   Spike led her over to a haphazard pile of boxes and broken pallets and made her sit.  "You rest here a minute, I'm gonna check on big sis, all right?  Xander and the wolf are coming, they're nearly here, all right?"

"Oh-ohkay Spike, okay," Dawn whispered, and she was white as paper, shivering.

Damnit, she's going into shock, Xan -?

Almost there, hang on -   Spike slipped off his duster and snugged it around Dawn's trembling shoulders and glanced over at the Slayer, who was advancing on the demon.  The demon wailed - choked - went up in a blast of smoke and sparks and Spike growled.

"Witch," he hissed, spotting Willow leaning against a pillar, blood on her face, residual magic crackling over her hands.  He pounced, flattening her to the pillar, threading his fingers through her hair and jerking her head around so she could see Dawn.

"Slayer!  See to your sister, she's hurt," he barked, and Buffy hesitated for a moment and then went to Dawn.  Willow bucked under him, panting.

"Spike - let me g-go, leave me -"

"Do you see what you did?  She's hurt, witch!  She's broken and she's bleeding and it's because of you.  It's because of your fucking magic.  Because you're too fucking weak to say no.  You took her to Rack."    Willow gasped, and Spike let his fangs trail over her throat - let his face press into the side of hers, so she'd know.

Know how she's gonna die.   Her fucking blood might poison me or it might get me off but I'm gonna TASTE it -

"Spike!  Don't!"  Xander was there, suddenly, the truck crooked in the street and the door hanging open and Spike wasn't even sure when he'd pulled up.  He could taste blood in his mouth and he realized he'd scraped Willow's neck - cut it just a little with a fang.  Her blood was hot and alive and rank with blackness and twisted desire and Spike wanted it.

"Dawn's hurt, Xander!  She needs the hospital and this -"   Spike shook Willow like a rag-doll and she wailed, flailing.  "This needs to be dealt with."

"Spike - you're not gonna kill her.  C'mon - let's take Dawn to the hospital - she's what counts right now.  Spike?"  Xander was walking to him, his hand out, and Spike felt, for just one moment, that it didn't matter.  That he would take the witch's blood and let it go through him like toxic fire.  That he would make Xander not care, somehow - that he would gather his family and leave this place and never once look back.  He could see it unfold in his mind, every step.

Spike, please don't.  Please, please don't.

"Xan?  Did you